The update of the month - from the perspective of Sophie Cat

Hi world. Sophie Cat here. I decided that it was time this blog had a touch of style and truth added to it. The title claims that I get to help, and yet rarely am I asked to contribute, so here we go, the month of August in review, by, me.

First of all, August seemed to involve A LOT of boxes. While the orange cat seemed to enjoy this, I, did not. Small minds may take delight in jumping in and out of things, but more developed minds know that boxes, in both large and small quantities, always mean that something is changing. I did not approve. Next, the boxes began fillings with all our earthly possessions, once again, I did not approve.

Come the middle of the month the boxes began disappearing, slowly at first and then faster. Finally, one day, the girl locked us in the bathroom with a bowl of water, our beds, and our litter box and what sounded like an army of people started trooping in and out of the apartment. Then, the girl and her old roommate came, dragged us out, and threw us in the back seat of the car. Everyone commented on the orange cat's big eyes and look of fear, but I was all tucked away unseen in my carrier.

The girl pulled into a garage and left us in the car for a while before she brought us in somewhere new. The room smelled all new and different, but yet all our things were there. The orange cat jumped under the bed right away and I stayed in my carrier till every one left me alone before coming out and exploring. The space seemed okay, but I was NOT impressed with all the moving about and I just wanted to go home. Alas though, the girl hoped into the bed, pulled me up, and we slept there that night, and every night since then too.

The moving however was not the worst thing that happened this month. The worst thing that happened, was what I found when I started to further explore. In her new house, the girl is harbouring a human and a feline or unknown origins. That's right, there's another cat, thankfully she comes with her own girl and is not trying to steal mine, but still. I have put her in her place numerous times, and now she runs after I give her a look in the proper way. The orange cat seems slightly interested in her, however the new cat's been hissing at him. The girl informs me that I need to be nice to him, but well, we'll see.

So that's this month. Furniture still keeps moving around, the girl flits in and out and the new cat seems here to stay. Hopefully this month will have FAR less trauma associated with it!

Projection aka The Sophie Cat WILL be lonely for me while I'm away

According to wikipedia (such a reliable source I know) Freud says that "projection is a psychological defense mechanism whereby one 'projects' one's own undesirable thoughts, motivations, desires and feelings onto someone else". In my work, I see projection a lot, however I haven't really been thinking about it a lot in terms of myself, and certainly not in terms of my relationship with Sophie Cat! Today I went to see my counsellor, who I see about once every five weeks or so, just to check in, and she pointed out to me that I seemed to be placing a lot of care and concern on what Sophie Cat might be feeling about life events worry about how they might affect her, without really being able to clearly articulate that I might be having similar feelings.

Monday, I got the keys to my new house. My new roommate and her cat move in on Thursday, and the cats and I move in next Wednesday. Then the last two weeks of September, I am going on a vacation with my dad and leaving my cats with my roommate to look after. Naturally, I expect that Sophie Cat is going to hate this. That she's going to have anxiety, that's she's going to be stressed, that she's going to pine for me. I worry that she'll get sick, or stop eating, or go back to her old evil, angry and hissing self. I worry that she'll hate the new cat and that things won't work out. I worry that she'll miss me terribly. And while these concerns are semi realistic (cats don't like change, especially Sophie Cat, there may also be some projection going on here).

Perhaps, I'm a bit nervous about not liking my roommate, just as I'm worried that Sophie will hate the new cat. Perhaps I'm a lot worried about getting homesick for my house and my cats, just like I'm worried Sophie won't like the new set up. Perhaps I'm worried that with my limited diet I won't be able to find food I can eat. And I'm sure there's some part of me that worries about what it will be like spending two weeks with my father. (I probably won't start hissing any more than I already do though...)

So these week, I plan to spend more time paying attention to projection. Not just what I'm projecting onto the cat, but what I'm projecting on to other people. I think it's an important thing to look at, particularly with clients, but in my personal life as well. It will be interesting to look at, and see if I notice anything. Also, I think I'll pay a little extra attention to my Sophie Cat. For both ours sakes!

on disclosure and/or did I tell you that?

That's a picture of her highness madam Sophie Cat licking out the inside of an empty cat food bag. I always give them the bag to play with, but I've never seen her disappear completely into it until tonight. The picture reminds me of being a counsellor in some ways, because for the most part, we stick a lot of our personal lives away in back corner and we don't talk about them with clients; they only see a little piece of us, like the tail sticking out of the bag. It's not a perfect metaphor, but the picture works for today's topic.

As a counsellor, I try to be quite "real" with clients. I share perhaps slightly more about my personal life than some, but I think for the most part, I really am quite guarded. All of my clients know I like cats, of course, they can't help but know as soon as they set foot in my office. Many of them also know that I have a second job and where it is, and I'm okay with that. For the most part though, that's it. I see know point in giving out information about my personal life unless it's relevant to the client and in their best interests. The point of counselling is certainly not for me to tell MY story. When I do groups I think I tend to share more of myself, simply because I am constantly having to come up with examples. Even then, they mostly revolve around fairly generic things, such as the fact that I have friends, and a family, nothing very specific.

Because of the above, it surprised me, when a client recently commented not just on me moving into my house, but on me getting a roommate. You see, I very much do NOT remember telling her this, and I'm really not sure why I would have. I might have shared with the group she was in that I was moving (and honestly it was probably in the context of cats, and how they don't like change, and how people don't either), but I have no idea why I would talk about the roommate thing. I didn't tell my family till yesterday. I mentioned the situation to a couple people on my team and the best we can figure is that the client must have over heard me talking to my coworkers at some point, listened, and remembered. Either that or I'm really not paying attention to what I'm saying.

I think, regardless of how the client found out about the details of my life, it's a reminder to watch what I say at work. I need to be more mindful about disclosure and make sure I am keeping the focus on the client, including the small talk we make. It also means that I probably need to watch my volume and watch where I am talking to coworkers, especially remembering that the room we eat lunch in has vents which carry sound quite far. There are definitely some things I share with coworkers, particularly over lunch, that I wouldn't want my clients to know about.

As professionals, there is so much power in what we say, and I think it's good to remind myself o this more often than I do. Words have power, and clients pay attention to what we say. Time to start paying closer attention to my words.

Things I've Learned

Today I got the clients to do an exercise for the last day of group in which they had to think of ten things they'd learned. Either things about employment, or coping skills, or job searching, or themselves, and so I figured that while they were working on it, I'd try and come up with ten things I'd learned in the past four weeks as well. I came up with 14 and thought I'd share them.

1. I am an adult... for real (I think I learn this one at least once a month though)

2. B12 shots rock my world

3. I don't want fixing, I want support (again, I learn this one a lot)

4. Half moon pose needs to be done from my finger tips

5. How to do a proper headstand the "yoga way"

6. How to stake peas and beans

7. It might not happen even when it feels right

8. Don't drink drinks made by a certain friend

9. How to be a better "mark" in ultimate frisbee

10. Gluten free buns are kind of gross (but they're buns I can eat so I eat them anyway)

11. Your SIN card no longer counts as ID for criminal record checks

12. Republic of Doyle is a great Canadian show

13. Cats at the office are good, transporting said cats to/from the office is not

14. Sophie Cat is a good judge of character (or at least dislikes the same people I do).

Grumpy Sophie Cat

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quick update

I got Sophie Cat shaved for the summer. She was NOT impressed. Not impressed at all. I think she secretly likes it though, SO much less fur for her to have to worry about. This lack of fur makes her a lot cooler and I worry less about her spending her summer in my top floor apartment.

Speaking of apartments. I bought a house. 17 more days until I get possession! I'm super excited, and super nervous. And there is of course the part where I HATE moving. It is just not my idea of a good time in any way, shape, or form. I fully intend on staying in my new little house until I have a really good reason to leave (and for the record, getting too much stuff, not a good reason to leave, that's just a good reason to get ride of stuff).

I'm still working both my jobs, but I have to say, working in an employment agency just has so much less excitement to it compared with working in the shelter overnight. I mean, it's a good job and all, just not as exciting. I really do like getting to use more of my social work skills and less of my babysitting skills though.

Also, I'm going to Africa in May. With my church, on a mission trip, not just randomly going or anything, but I'm quite nervous about it. I've never been off the continent and never even considered going to Africa until this year. We'll see how it goes. I know God will be with me, but it scares me like crazy.

and... that's all?! I apparently have nothing all that interesting to say tonight.

goodnight all :)

Sophie Cat

This is how Sophie Cat greets me every day when I come home from work. If I come home at the wrong time however, no greeting for me.

Day 10

My.body.hurts. I'm not sure what it is about today, but my body hurts. A lot. Maybe it's the fact that I did a 90 minute class today as opposed to my usual 60, but I'm definitely rather sore. Then again, my body hurt somewhat before yoga as well...so I suppose it's probably cumulative.

I don't have any amazing reflections about patience or learning today. Mostly, I'm just at a point where I need to push through. Maybe I'll be deeper tomorrow. So instead, here's pictures of my cats.

So, I have a social work student...

This is Sophie Cat. See her stare? She is saying "help my girl" (Oliver Lockhart just keeps walking across the keyboard erasing things). So, why do I need help? Well, my social work student arrived yesterday. My very first one. I had done lots of thinking, reflection, and preparation, gone to workshops, done all the paperwork, but now she's here. Now I'm panicking. I am so worried I am going to screw this poor girl up. My biggest problem though, especially this week and next, is figuring out how to balance taking care of my case load and my documentation (which as you know, I'm constantly behind in) and still finding time to do a good job with her. I don't want her to be as bored as I was the first month at my first practicum.

So, for those of you who've been there, cause all us social workers have, what was good about your field instructor? What was bad about your field instructor? If you are still in practicum, what's good, what's bad? If you've had a student, how did you find the balance? Any advice for a first time supervisor?

So yeah. That's what's going in my life. More later though.

The Dreamer.

don't give up on me yet!

Hello faithful readers of this blog. this is a message to say. Don't give up on me yet! One of these days there will be more awesome social work blogging! I'm enjoying my new job a lot, but it's not as exciting as working at the shelter, that's for sure, and I find I don't have as many things to write about. Besides that, I sometimes feel like I spend all day at the computer, and the last thing I want to do when I get home is more typing. But, it will come. I love to write, I'm just not in a writing season it seems.

Things are going well. The cats are very slowly getting used to each other. And by that I mean Sophie Cat is slowly getting used to having Oliver Lockhart around. She still hisses if he gets to close, and all he wants to do is be friends! Thankfully Oliver still is put in a different room at night, and Sophie and I get some peace. Having a young cat is "exciting", he gets into EVERYTHING! But I love him!

I went and donated blood today. If you're eligible to donate blood I highly recommend doing. It's an hour out of your day every eight weeks (or more of course) and you can save up to three lives. It means so much to someone, and it doesn't hurt you at all. Well, the initial needle poke hurts a bit, but other then that. Of course, not everyone is eligible because there are a million and one things that disqualify you, but apparently only 3% of those eligible donate. Summer is a time when they need more blood and have less donors, so seriously, consider donating. If you ever wondered how you could give more to charity with no money, well remember, donating blood is free! (So that's today's plug for that)

Meet Oliver Lockhart

So I went to the Pet Store where I bought Sophie Cat the other day. I hadn't been there since I brought her home...

someone new came home with me...

This is Oliver Lockhart (Oliver from Oliver and Company, Lockhart from Gildoroy Lockhart from Harry Potter 2).

He is a year and a half old. The Pet Store rescued him from the Humane Society which was going to euthanize him because it was cheaper to kill him than to neuter him. Oliver is basically the complete opposite of Sophie Cat. You can do anything to him and he'll just purr away. Sophie on the other hand has been hissing and growling at him from the other side of the baby gate. This is going to take some time.

Oh, and for good measure, here's a picture of Sophie Cat trying to stuff herself into her cat condo.

Poor Sophie. SO not impressed with the new addition to our family. I'm really hoping she gets used to him. Otherwise bestest bud will take him, but I really want to keep him too. I really think Sophie needs a friend, she just needs to get over her anger/fear.

The Sophie Cat's day as a Social Work Cat

Have I mentioned lately how much I love my job? Well, it turns out that Sophie Cat doesn't mind it either. I brought her to work today, this is a picture of the last time she came to work, but I didn't think to take any today. My workplace is super great about pets. My boss has brought her puppy a couple times, and as long as no one on the floor minds, we're free to do whatever. I mean, within reason.

I only brought Soph's because they're were cleaning the ducts in my apartment and I did not think she would like to be home for strange men trapsing through here. She HATED the day they tested the smoke detectors. I swear she didn't come out from under the couch all day!

Anyway, Sophie got along quite well. She came out of her carrier right when we got there and settled in on a blanket under the desk. I left her off the leash this time and she was very well behaved. At first she stayed in the office, but as she got braver, she came with me to the file room and we went to visit a couple other staff. I took her to meet the students in the employment class, because I talk about her pretty much every time I teach, but that was just too many people for her. And being a cat, she hid under the chair of the one person in the class who doesn't like cats.

I'm thinking about bringing her more often. Some of the clients just lit up. It's times like this I wish I had a dog, dogs are such good therapy animals, or well, some dogs/owners are. One of my friends online and her dog just became a therapy team. Anyway though, Sophie Cat would be horrible at it, as she's still very shy, and she is NOT a lap cat. But, I just think she adds something to my office. On the other hand, SO many people are allergic to cats, that it would just be a bad idea all around.

The cutest moment of the day, was when at almost exactly 4PM she hoped in her carrier and looked at me like "okay, time to go!" I had to break it to her that I don't get off until 4:30 and she still had some time to kill!

Sophie Cat gets a summer hair cut!

cleaning (gulp)

So, things you may not know about the dreamer.  I am VERY messy.  Very, very, very messy.  My apartment was definitely turning into a fire hazard (although some claim it was turning into a bio hazard).  So, naturally, instead of cleaning it myself, I exercised me right to pay someone to do the things I don't want to do... my little sister.  I can't say my mother was too happy about the arrangement, but my sister is currently unemployed, and I'm paying her a very fair wage, more then she'd make working in retail or something.  She spent five hours today.  She did things like take all my plants down and wash my window sill... incredible.  

The Sophie Cat does NOT like the cleaning thing.  The cat doesn't even like it when I clean, but having someone else there while it was happening, was seriously not working for her.  I find is sooo funny that she doesn't like cleaning any more then I do.  She hides generally.  I think she doesn't like the changes that happen.  Things get moved, things get removed etc... Plus there is of coures the noisy vacuum.  

Currently, the cat is lying on top of my arm.  It makes it hard to type, but I think she is incredibely relived that I am no longer cleaning and trying frantically to make sure it doesn't start again... and it won't, till tomorrow.  My sister is coming back when I'm at work to continue tackling the disaster zone.  

Interestingly, my mom looks at this as exploitation.  I look at this as humbling myself enough to admit that things are out of control and I need help to get things back... 

dreamer finds a boy (oh wait, I'm supposed to call him a "man")

You may have been wondering what happeneded to the dreamer over the past couple weeks.  Where have her deeply insightful and thought provoking posts gone?  Well, there is a simple answer, as happens to many of us, the dreamer has found herself a boyfriend who from now on will be referred to simply at "the intrepid one".  He got that name when we were 13 and it's stuck.  So yes, instead of lying on my couch blogging, I've actually been getting out of my house and seeing movies, and eating ice cream.  Although yesterday, we sat on the couch together and watched 8 or so episodes of Friends.  

Things seem to be going well these days.  I have yet another set of antibiotics for the never ending sinus infectiong, but I'm trying to be really diligant about taking care of myself so that maybe this time it'll finally go away!  

Work is going well.  My case load still really isn't picking up that much, but it's summer, and apparently that's what happens.  I've been doing quite a few intake interviews though, which is nice, I LOVE learning people's stories.  

Church is good as well.  And I'm seeing my spiritual director again on Tuesday.  

Sophie Cat is doing well.  She really seems to like the intrepid one, which is good, because it's vital that the two of them get along.  Yesterday she kept a very close eye on him...it was kind of creepy actually.  I think she senses something is up because she doesn't stare at bestest buds boyfriend the same way.  Currently she's sticking her paw in her water dish and licking the water off her paw... she doesn't like to drink the normal way.  

So hopefully more social work posts shall follow soon.  I'm off to get my morning coffee before I go into major caffienne withdrawl.  

long time no post.

I'm still not posting much.  I was out a lot today, no time for writing.  Church, yoga, gelati, dinner, tossing around a frisbee with friends.  Much to do.  

BUT, for those of you who twitter... So does Sophie Cat!!!

Follow her on twitter :)  http://twitter.com/TheSophieCat   

that is all. 

My Office

As promised, here are the pictures of my office, complete with my favourite Sophie Cat picture.  You'll also notice her as my desktop background... if nothing else she's a coworker conversation starter "is that your cat?", "yes, her name is Sophie Cat".  

tired but good

This is Sophie cat when I thought she was sick, wrapped up and getting eaten by my giant Tigger (thanks to bestest bud).  She's all back to her normal self now despite conning hummus, cool whip, and assorted other foods out of me the past couple days.  

My new job is going really well.  I'll post pictures of my office soon (I'm waaay too excited about having my own office, and I also realized it won't happen in many of my future jobs, and I do believe in open office concepts, it's just FUN!  I'm slightly worried the job will be too boring, and while it's good, I'm definitely not used to people actually caring about what I do and how I'm doing.  Things are going to take a little getting used to.  No more having down days where I get to read fiction all night!  The sleep thing is difficulty, especially the waking up part, but I'll survive, I always do! 

Thanks for all the supportive comments on the last post.  You guys are awesome! 

update on me

I've been off most of this week in between my two jobs, so naturally, I didn't bother to use any of my free time to write.  So, I'll try and make up for that with an update about how things are going. 

1. The Sophie cat seems just fine.  I have come to realize that I've never spent any time with her during the day (I've worked nights the whole time I've had her) and it's just how she is.  Plus, that day the caretaker was in to test my smoke detector while I was out and that probably scared her. 

2. Investigation at work.  This probably deserves it's own post, but in short, it's over.  I get to come in for a meeting to recieve my official letter of instruction...apparently it's not disciplinary though?  Anyway, I'm just a little mad, but at least it'll be over and done with (and I have A LOT to say about the difference between empowerment and clients having too much power). 

3. New job.  I went and had lunch with my new team this week.  They seem really nice, and I went to school with one of them, so at least I know her.  It was a welcome change to have them say how much I would like working there and that it was a good workplace as opposed to when I had my orientation at the shelter and was warned about particular staff members and particular shifts first thing. 

4. My emotional health.  I feel SO much better this week.  Definitely was good to have some time off.  I also spent time with friends and went out for coffee with someone I really respect.  She suggested going for spiritual direction, and I think I will.  I'm looking into it.  

5. My physical health.  If you look back at my blog, all year I've gotten sick every three months.  This pattern actually continues from before the start of the blog, it's just me.  The pattern failed, and only one month after the last occurance of strep throat, I am sick again.  After three days of having a low grade fever I finally dragged myself into Urgent Care last night and discovered that I have the dreaded "sinus infection"... ick.  Much as I don't want surgery, it'd be nice if I could just drill some holes in there so I could drain them and not waste 10 more days of my life on antibiotics.  SUPERGERMS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (ahh run for your life). 

And so, that's me in a nutshell.  My new job starts Monday.  I now own a professional wardrobe, including high heeled shoes (if you can call an inch high, the point is, I have heels).  I'll post pictures of my cast once I break an ankle (shouldn't be long).  I also own makeup.  Now I just have to put in on... I was going to practice this week, but well, it never happened, so we'll just hope for the best Monday morning and I'll wind up at work looking like a drunk clown.  But I'm not sarcastic at all!

Happy Saturday!!!

Sophie Cat is sick?

I'm very worried about the Sophie Cat.  She is not herself today at all.  She's lethargic, far more so than usual, for starters.  And she's not meowing or purring like herself.  She didn't come out from under the couch when I got home and I freaked out cause I thought she was missing.  Turned out she was in the best hiding spot ever, and she wouldn't come out till I lifted her out, and even then, she didn't complain.  She's not eating right either, or drinking.  

Bestest bud and I called the vet, the advice was that I should try and force feed her and if she wouldn't take anything, then I should bring her in.  Well, after a great deal of effort I did manage to get her to eat a sizeable amount of wet food mixed with water, so she's had some food and water now and is on the couch.  she tried to crawl back under, but I wanted her where I could keep an eye on her.  So, she's in her bed covered with a blanket (which she NEVER tolerates) just lying there.  I'm watching her breath, and hoping she's just having an off day, and that my changing schedule along with our trip to the vet for a weigh in and the pet store yesterday traumatized her and she just needs to recover.  

Of course, I'm picked up an evening shift tonight, which I need, but it means I can't stay home with her.  Bestest bud will come and check on her, while I'm at work, but still.  Sigh.  I am quite worried about her!